There are few things in a man’s life that draw more ridicule and scorn than when he reveals a trait that is branded “feminine”. After all – men are supposed to have no interest whatsoever in the feminine, and aspiring to anything feminine is so repulsive and foreign that any man who publicly displays such a pursuit is assumed to be gay or downright mental.
Why is it this way? Is it simply for practical reasons that men don’t express their feminine side, or is there some other reason? An exploration of the question brings up some very interesting reasons why men don’t wear dresses. Among the most popular explanations are:
- Dresses are uncomfortable and restrictive of movement: This reason forgets that there are many different styles of dresses that can be worn. Many dresses that you see women wear these days are actually less restrictive in movement, and would be more free below the waist than most pants that men already wear. Consider that dresses and skirts can be both cooler and place no pressure on the private ares like pants do (a plus for sexual health). The argument that dresses are uncomfortable makes no sense whatsoever unless it’s super-tight dresses we’re talking about – which the majority of women do not wear on a daily basis.
- Because only gay men would want to wear a dress: This is another completely silly argument. How many gay men have you ever met that wear dresses? When a woman wears pants to the office, or when she borrows her boyfriend’s sweater do we wonder if she’s a lesbian? Of course not. Multiple scientific studies have shown that less than 5% of crossdressers are homosexual. That means the overwhelming majority of men who would want to wear a dress are not gay at all.
- Cross dressing is a sin: This is a more complex argument, and is based on a literal interpretation of Deuteronomy 22:5 which states that neither women or men should wear each other’s clothing. There are numerous arguments against a literal interpretation of this text, and explanations that this Old Testament verse is more about using deception to lead another to sin than a wholesale condemnation of wearing an article of clothing from the opposite sex. Even if it was a wholesale condemnation what should we do with all the women who wear “boy shorts” and pants, and all the other verses in Deuteronomy that we ignore on a daily basis? What about all the men in the Middle East and Scotland who wear clothing that strikingly resemble their female counterparts?
Of course there are more reasons than just these three that people use to justify the negative stigma of a man wearing a dress. Most of the reasons though are pretty simplistic like, “it’s just wrong,” or “because it’s stupid”. But I’ve long believed there are deeper reasons behind why it’s seen as inappropriate for men to wear women’s clothing.
Recently I’ve come across some excellent discussions of the topic, and two in particular I think hit the nail on the head as to the underlying issue behind men who cross dress. A comment by Lauren O in one of those articles sums up the entire argument into a couple concise sentences:
“I think it’s perhaps more likely that it’s easier for society to accept women taking on men’s roles than it is for men to take on women’s roles, because women are seen as inferior. A woman wanting to take on men’s roles seems less offensive, because, the reasoning goes, who wouldn’t want to be a member of the superior sex? A man wanting to take on women’s roles seems more offensive, because what man would ever want to degrade himself like that?”
I couldn’t agree more. The majority of the negative responses to a man wearing a dress have to do with the way that some men (and women) comprehend the genders. Many individuals still see the woman’s role to serve the man and be subservient to him. Likewise, many people feel that they very reason a woman dresses the way she does is to simply impress men and garner their attention. If we’re to assume that the function of women, and the behavior of women is centered around pleasing and attracting men, it becomes perfectly reasonable for people to think that someone who wants to cross-dress is “gay”. But this argument also reveals that sexism and the viewing of women as “objects” is still alive and well in modern society. This has not only a continued negative effect on women, but on men who are stereotyped into their own roles as well.
Assessing attitudes towards cross-dressing men serves as an excellent litmus test for how an individual views the broader role of femininity in society.
I believe the negative response that both men and women have against men wearing dresses is more about the power of masculinity, and about how both men and women see the role of both genders in society. Even many women are threatened by their husband or boyfriend wearing a dress, much in the same way that men were once threatened by women burning bras, talking politics, and wearing trousers – but the reasons for such fear are based in sexism, inequality, and intolerance.
The reason that men don’t wear dresses (or let other men do it)? Because doing so dilutes the power that is imbued in masculinity; because a man in a dress isn’t just simply making a fashion statement, but is threatening a gender icon itself. Once men and women are truly equals, a man in a dress will be no big deal.
Further Reading:
Vernon Coleman: Why Do Men Wear Dresses? (And Why Do Some Women Get So Upset About It?)
Img credit: eyesontheroad.
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I really enjoyed reading your post, Mattie. I think you are right on with the reasons why men cannot wear dresses. I never understood why men stopped wearing gowns and skirts. It just seems more reasonable for men to wear garments that allow easy access and comfort rather than those that are binding where they shouldn’t be. I have to believe that as progressive ideas permeate society, gender lines will begin to blur as more men become honest about what they would like to wear and how they would like to live. (Also, once corporations realize the profit potential in offering men a wider variety in clothing and vanity products, there will be greater social acceptance of men in dresses…).
I am not a crossdresser. I am a mature, professional woman who dates a crossdresser. Can anyone enlighten me as to whether others, when dressed, take on a more feminine persona? I wonder if he is borderline transgender,, yet denies it at this time. Also, does anyone else find a need to take pictures of themselves in private – dressed and made up?
I am not opposed by this behavior but simply, even after 4 months of dating, do not understand. My willingness to accept this behavior is dwindling, but I love him dearly. He often needs to make a conscious decision to dress like my man. I can’t imagine being under such duress.
KK in response to your boyfriend, I think its great that your boyfriend told you he was liked to wear womens cloths, Honesty goes a long way. Yes crossdressing or just dressing up can be very addictive just rember i know this my self. I think you can have a great relationship as long as it doesnt become overly addictive behavior, and yes sometimes it can lead to other things sometimes men want to have sex changes, I debated over many years of just wanting to become a woman but then i realized i needed to be happy with myself first. I personally think cross dressing is an extremely deep rooted physciatriatic approach to needing lots of love and acceptance. good luck
I am frankly amazed that clothing companies have not sought to profit from the undeniable fact that given a chance and the “permission” to do so, many many, and maybe most men, would love to wear a dress, high heels, and beautiful underwear.
Remember the 70′s when we (boys)could all wear tight fitted clothing, long hair, and high heels? I am sitting in a very pretty dress as I write this. I simply prefer dresses to trousers. And yes, I also prefer pretty and soft underwear to boxer shorts too.
I am convinced that this is because I am not exclusively “male”, anymore than anyone else is exsclusively “female”. Gender is so little understood. Our understanding of ourselves in this respect, has in my oppinion, travelled backwards, as our societies have seemingly advanced.
The idiot that said women are from venus and men are from mars, was clearly a very repressed individual indded.
But this is a huge subject, and the more I read, the more excited I get about the future being far more relaxed than is hitherto the case.
Some people profiteer by fostering beliefs that add to notions of actual differences between the sexes. In so doing, they ignore that all people are individuals. But the mental health cult wants to COLLECTIVIZE everyone. In clothing, women are treated as individuals and are inundated with messages saying “express yourself any way you wish” whereas men are collectivized and told they are “transvestites” if they want choices. Yet, to want choices is a human, not female only, characteristic. People who have degrees in “human sexuality” are largely know nothing, be nothing, do nothing SOB’s (like John Money). They never saw a Greek soldier in his short full petticoat and would not know how to classify him. However, what needs to be studied is not men in skirts, but rather, the behaviorist needs to be STUDIED. He needs to be studied as a subject specimen, and monitored by everyone to see what his “clinical disorders” consist of. Haw f*****g haw. Women wear 2 styles because society raises them with choices. Men wear 1 style because society raises them without choices. This is LEARNED behavior, not biologically determined. The Mars/Venus B.S. is irrational. Both sexes have worn both styles forever in various times and places with NO “threat to the family unit.”
I once heard one of the dancers from the Ballet Trocadero discuss this. He was asked why can women crossdress and men can’t. He didn’t think it had anything to with “forsaking men’s privilege” or “the Bible.” He said men could wear and have worn any style of clothing you can think of, but they don’t wear women’s clothes because it evokes laughter. Why? Because of proportion. He used the analogy of a cartoonist’s mantra: A mouse imitating an elephant? Interesting. An elephant imitating a mouse? Funny. No one wants to be laughed at. He thought it was as simple as that.
This world around us is going to hell in a hand basket the econame is up side down and yet we say all kinds of things about a man in a dress o come on If we spent as much time and energe fighting the goverment as we do about a man in a dress we just might get this world in shape. Do we really have the right or the time to worry about what a man wear’s. We worry about little s**t like this when our kid’s are being shoot at in our schools our life as we know it is being taken away form us BUT let’s worry about that man in a dress THING i guess thats moor inportan WHAT EVER quit jugeing others for what they wear and let’s get our live’s back from the you know wat’s in Washington. Or can’t a man in a dress even do anything about this?????
Dresses are not designed for men and are too feminine. In reality pants are not designed with a mans anatomy in mind. All the cloth is sowed together right across the privates. Any man can tell you they frequently get pinched or crushed by pants and it hurts. A better option is traditi0nal masculine garments such as a kilt, lava lava, cafton, and other such unbifurcated garments worn around the world. Pants are not a badge of masculinity when 95 percent of the women are wearing them. Any man having wrapped a towel around himself upon exiting the shower knows how comfortable it is.
I would prefer to wear dresses all the time, but sadly society views women wearing mens clothing, but not the opposite. Why this is don’t know, when I do dress up I pass as a female, with the exception of my voice
My view is that women, in their blind pursuit of “equality” and consequential desire to become more like men have eschewed sexy underwear on the grounds that it is too “girly”. Men resent this and I’m not surprised that they have taken over this role. Women have lost the plot, and if men want to wear skirts and lingerie, who do women have to blame but themselves? Look at a street in any place, any time, during the UK summer – who is baring their legs; yes, it’s the man in shorts – his daughter may be wearing a dress, but she’ll give that up at about 7 years old and his son will probably be wearing bermudas. And what’s the woman wearing? Leggings of course, even though it’s 25 degrees C.
So why is anyone surprised that it might be men who end up wearing summer dresses? Women sure as hell don’t any more.
My reply to this intriguing article is that the roles of perceived dominance between men and woman are defiantly the key factor of cross-dressing and male feminization. I’ve been a part time cross dresser for as long as I can remember but, after much thought and long talks with my wife, I believe I started this life style around the time I realized the difference in the roles of male and female. I have a type “A” personality and have always loved the difference in the way I feel and am looked at by both male and female alike while dressed in woman’s clothing. I don’t think this is an original thought do to the number of dominating and sissification web-sites on the net. I believe, and hope there will always be a segregation of the sexes otherwise, what’s the point of cross-dressing? I personally do it to “feel” more feminine.
I wear skirts & dresses because i fell as myself dressed as such. I go to town, local stores, malls wearing dresses and skirts and heels. My wife goes with me and helps me pick out all of my dresses and we have a lot
of fun with it. It is also a lot of fun to see all the looks i get.
POWER TO THE MEN WHO HAVE THE NERVE TO DRESS THE
WAY THEY FELL !!!!!
The primary reason men don’t wear dresses is because the bodice generally doesn’t reach a man’s waist (by about 2-3 inches) while the skirt portion generally reaches to just above the knees. I prefer the dresses that flare out from just under the arms in an a-line. Mostly however I prefer skirts that are also a-line. I also like to wear skorts (a skirt w/built in shorts), but not the short ones, mine go to 1-2 inches above my knees. I can wear these because I’m thin at only 135lbs. I do not shave my legs, nor do I try to pass myself off as a female, which some guys try to do and look rediculous. If women would start demanding that stores like Walmart, etc, would start carrying skirts for men it would take away the stigma of them being womens/girls garments. Mothers, wives and girlfriends of guys should buy their men/boys a couple of skirts, take away their pants for the summer, and let them feel the comfort of breeze coming up on their thighs. The men/boys do not have to wear panties like some feminist group say or would like. Although some panties are a little bit more comfortable then the bulky underwear we guys normally wear, especially tighty-whiteys, you could use the thick leg holes for a tourniquet for a severe would, yes they are that thick. Boxers just bunch up under a skirt, trust me I know. Another thing is that men’s or boys (if of age) sperm counts are affected by heat, meaning the looser the garment the more productive a male would be. A skirt is a lot looser than any pair of pants or shorts that guys wear, including the baggie type because they still have a seam that goes up through the legs.
Honestly, I’m a kid doing a project on the 60′s for school and stumbled across this. I am a closet cross-dresser, and honestly it is more so the comedy and mystery behind me that makes me want to wear my mom’s lingerie while she and my dad are at work.
Every crazy clothes day at my middle school you see half-the guys wearing dresses over jeans and t-shirts, frilly tutus, and heels. Meanwhile the girls just wear a slipper, dye their hair, and forget about it.
to Aunt jo-momma;
If you are a real crossdresser then why hide in the closet. Did you know that it is fashionable for guys to wear skirts or skorts.
In Japan they can’t keep them on the shelves almost similar to the jeans chaos from the late 70s into the 80s. If you really want to wear some comfortable go to marcus uniforms on the internet. They have skorts in Navy blue, black and tan. Skorts are skirts with shorts sewn into them. The shorts are on nylon and a shorter then the hem of the skirt. My friends and I wear them everywhere. To the store, gas station, even to kmart. You could even wear them to the library. These are more acceptable then regular skirts. Nobody has ever said a derogatory remark to any of us, even if we were by ourselves at the stores or places mentioned. Since the shorts are similar to the liners in mens’ swimtrunks (not transparent) there is one other comfort issue, YOU DON’T HAVE TO WEAR ANY TYPE OF UNDERWEAR. The cost is reasonable as well, only $7 each. Try spending your money on a couple of them, wear them around for a couple of days, you won’t want to wear pants again. TRUST ME, I wear them.
I am a hetrosexual male, that wears lingerie and dresses, every chance I get. I for one, prefer, vintage style lingerie and dresses. Like the Lucy dresses, and circle skirts. To bad that they stopped making femine looking dresses and skirts!
Daniel,
I do agree that the dresses today don’t express much in feminity. I wore my first dress at 11 years of age. The reason for this was nor forced dressing but because my mother firmly believed boys could and should wear dresses. My first dress was a girls party dress. It was yellow with a flower print on the bottom. It also had a sewn in petticoat attached. Almost similar to Easter dresses today, but they were fuller and tapered out from the waist because of the petticoats. This dress along with anklet socks and maryjanes, my mother said I was very cute. My brothers rejected the dresses by destroying them, but I loved them.
I thought how could a person NOT want to wear something so soft, so pretty and so comfortable. Over the nxt 5 years my mother kept adding dresses to my closet. This was in 1961 to 1966, you would have to look at vintage little girls dresses at that time to fully understand what I am saying.
Tammy,
I agree that there are certain men who feel that they NEED to express their feminine side. It dwells in each of us, male or female, due to our DNA make-up. I too like to express my girly side on occasion, but also feel that mens clothes are sparse as to styles and by allowing skirts and dresses in men’s styles would open a new avenue for all concerned. For instance, when I was 11 I had the prettiest party dresses anyone could want, I also had everyday dresses that were not all frills and lace. Some did not require petticoats or slips. My mother encouraged me to wear them, so I did have an advantage over most boys. While I did not play sports, I did love riding my bicycle in the dresses. The freedom was unbelievable. I did not start wearing skirts til later in life.
I still like lacey frilly dresses and probably will for the rest of my life. I also like to go out in my more masculine skirts, skorts and kilts. Not everyday is for the wearing of the frilly things, just for special occasions, like birthdays and holidays.
Well I wear skirts and dresses almost exclusively, it’s gotten so that I hate pants. While it is difficult sometimes to find a dress that fits right and doesn’t make me look ridiculous, it is possible and I have several. It’s much easier to find a nice skirt. Many of the womens skirts do not look feminine at all so it’s easy to find one that looks very stylish and appropriate. Also, since you can buy a different size top than what the skirt is, it’s much easier to get a combination that fits correctly. Of course I also like to wear very feminine looking skirts and tops on occasion too, it all depends on the situation. So skirts and dresses look nicer and are more comfortable. I expect that soon more men will catch on to that secret.
Don,
I too like dress but prefer skirts. They are a lot more veratile
then dresses. DRESSES ARE ONLY SKIRTS WITH THE TOPS ATTACHED. Skirts (my preferred clothing) are like pants sort of. You can mix and match tops a lot easier.
For instance with my Navy blue skirt/skort I can wear a pink polo shirt, a light blue Polo or even a vertical striped blue and white polo. The polos can be womens or mens since there is little difference. The best part with the changes of the tops each outfit looks a little different from the others.
One skirt with three different tops gives you an outfit for three different days. Thats half a week. Thus it cuts down on laundry as long as your skirt doesn’t get dirty or stained.
Im male and wear denim mini skirt also wear black tights on that look nice as Im too slim body shape (smaller waist and wide hip as Im suffered from weight loss) – cant wear men clothes size included trousers cos it too big for me. Skirts usual good to wear and very lighter also comfortable, easy to wash and iron – cheap than buy trousers like Ebay i got quite a lots of mini skirt (denim, velvet and cord) between £1.99 to £10 – i usual wear black tights then skirt on and any top to make look nicely and then either flat shoes like pump or calf suede boots/knee-length boots (flat heels). It nothing wrong with men in skirt as it normal clothes as women already wearing most of it so it your body to wear as it yer business – no one tell you what to wear, it yer money to buy and wear so have fun.
Look at the three comments first stated in this article.
The comment of uncomfortable or restrictive can only be derived from the style or cut of the dress. I have found that dresses are actually more comfortable and less restrictive if the styles are in a more a-line then in straight slim styles. These styles are however usually only available during the spring, summer or early fall months. I have a 36″ stride as most men have a longer stride then most women. Men also walk with their legs apart with the feet outward as opposed to women who place one foot in front of the other. A dress is less restrictive in allowing me a normal stride or if I need to run for some reason
As far as only gay men would wear a dress is completely wrong. Gay males are trying to attract other males. They want to appear as masculine as possible for most (only about 8% of gay males crossdress). Some even go to extremes to express their masculinity by wearing leather and chains, growing beards or bushy moustaches. Most guys who wear dresses seek females for sexual partners, and somme women like to see their guys expressing their feminine side.
As far as it being sinful, that is without merit. The only sexual sin is LUST. It is the coveting of those who are not available. That includes gays, lesbians or straights. Those who lust after the girlfriend or boyfriend, wife or husband of another, even though they are engaged with another person is the one guilty of lust and has commited a sin in god’s eye. God stated in the bible
he/she made us in his/her image, so I can only conclude that God is transgendered. Neither male nor female, but a combination of both genders. Even Angels are of both genders,
dressed alike in flowing gowns and robes with the same glowing halos.
It should therefore be acknowledged by all that is human, that other then genitalia there is no difference between that of a man or a woman. When the world finally wakes up to this fact as well as others (race,creed, etc), that we will move forward to really solve some of our greatest problems.
It is good for people to be honest to themselves. I am sitting here writing this, wearing nylon granny panties, a vintage nylon slip, a pretty padded bra, pumps, and a vintage dress. You make the clothing; it does not make you. Were what expresses your true self.
Being true to your self is what it is abought . Clothing was invented to keep you from getting scrapes and cuts . if you take the bibles vew god only gave anamial skins to cloth man after they thought they they were naked ….. I wear skirts,dresses,bras,pantys 24/7 . 360 a year if a person feels more comfrentable in a skirt than pants they should just go for it … Dont let the sheeple tell you what to wear because you only get one shot at life and and going to your death bed with regrets is not a good thing live life to the fullest …
besides i like skirts & dresses they are way more confrormt to wear than shorts or pants !!!!
I have read most of the comments here.I love to wear dresses for a lot of the same reason. I love the feel and looks of preety dresses and skirts. One thing I really did notice when having a skirt on when driving long distant.very more confortable not having the pants ridding up into my crotch and being unconfortable.skirts and dress are very more jst because of that.not to mention lots cooler on warm days’ I like the feeling of the air up my skirt. i am feminine when I want to be and manly when I want. i wish we could wear what we want.Lets face it women clothes are a lot preetier. and I love preety clothes.
I can’t say that I understand any of this, but like any curious 7 yr old boy, I discovered the innocent pleasure of shuffling in my mothers high heels. I’m not quite sure why I thought it would be a good idea but I did it and I liked it. I didn’t grow up to be a cross-dresser but I do find masculine men who wear women’s clothing somewhat intriguing. I recently discovered this painting of a masculine guy in pink heels. The artist captured exactly what I’ve always found to be fascinating about a man wearing a article of women’s clothing. http://fineartamerica.com/featured/1-angelas-husband-steffen-anderson.html
G.G HAVE IT MADE IN THE FASHION WORLD # 1 THEY CAN WEAR SKIRTS, OR DRESSES . THEY CAN ALSO WEAR PANTS,MENS…SHIRTS MENS.. SENAKERS MES… TIES MEN…. SPORTS JACKETS MENS… & SO ON. THE ONLY TIME I CAN PUT ON A SKIRT OR DRESS ( IM A CROSSDRESSER) IS ON HALLOWEEN AND NOT GET THE SHIT KICKED OUT OF ME, ITS TOTALLY UN FAIR.
I agree with you as I also am a crossdresser. But on thing that I have discovered is going out of a drive late at night dressed can still satisfy your need to want to be out in public. I know that’s what I do! It does suck though, especially since Holloween is still 3+ months away.
Wearing womans cloths, helps bring out the softer side of a man , a side I think men tend to surpress for the manly mocho he-man image, That our society demands, men are hunters and killers, woman are child beares and home makers, peaceful in most cases. I for one enjoy being dressed as a woman , I like to feel like a woman, soft wishing I was desireed and sote after, alas that is a dream but one I hang on to , I especially like frilly pink panties and frilly tops and skirts, high heels and nylons.
I get home and change right way, I leave the world of the angry male on the world side and enter into the home maker wife and sensual love giver, just need some woman to accept my gifts of affection.
It is up to the women in this coountry to start the change you are talking about. Have you bought your husband,
boyfriend or son a skirt or dress. Have you encourage them to express their femine side. While we male do have a feminine side, we are taught to suppress it. Our feminine side is always there, it is in our DNA. 26 Chromesomes,
13 from your Mother and the same from your Father.
In the womb, all babies were initially female (fact). Look at the head of the male penis, near the pea-hole, you will see that the soft tissue looks like a girls genitals. I am sorry I can’t draw it here for you, but it is exactly like a girls, slit and all.
I am proud to call my self a crossdresser. I wear mini skirts, nylons and high heels. But I believe that when I’m out in public dressed I get a mixed response… Some men are checking me out because they are either attracted to me or disgusted of me being dressed as a women. Women mostly try to pay not attention or are looking trying to see if I’m a man in a skirt and heels. I wish that I could go out into public dressed wearing what I feel comfortable in and receive the same respect that I would if I were in a suit and a tie. But let’s be realistic… If that day ever does happen, it’s not going to be for some time! Good luck to you all!
I hate to say this Jay but women do not receive respect for dressing in a skirt and heels either, but it still is fun. Probably will be a while before we get the respect we deserve as well. Keep wearing what makes you happy. I would love for the world to change for my sons.
First I wear mt skirts out shopping, to the park, and to various other places. I have found women in general do look at what you are wearing. They are looking for the style, color coordination, shoes and other things. If properly attired women will comment (in public) how well you look, also if you look cheap (hooker style) they will make derogatory remarks.
I do not attempt to pass as a woman, my beard is to heavy, I am six foot tall. my only favorable aspect is my weight (134 lbs).
Don’t get me wrong, I also like dresses but don’t care for most of the styles available today. To many of them are body forming and restrict movement. The only dresses that are not are summer dresses. The problem with these for me is that they show my breasts. As a boy I had started developing breasts and was given shots to stop them, but not until they reached a B-cup.
My girlfriend discovered this when we went to a halloween
party (me as a woman). After putting the bra on me (a push-up bra) she exclaimed “you’ve got cleavage”. She was amazed guys could grow breasts. she always thouls thing.
Getting back to the subject of skirts and dresses for men and boys. Up until 1947 you could buy a boy a “boys Dress”, they were sold via mail order or in the cities at major department stores. (picaswebalbums-robertmooresphotos)(his/clo.com).
Also men slept in nightshirts (mens nightgown). For some unknown reason these items fell to the wayside. Why, it didn’t turn them gay. were even special dresses for boys for domestic
work with pinafores. There were even ribbons and bows for boys hair. For some reason we also let this fall away. We allowed the over machoism to replace it. Since then domestic violence has increased dramatically. Boys overly expressing
their male dominance. Also unfortunately this also increased the cases of prostrate problems, and cancers of the male genitalia (wearing of pants). It was discovered that pants increase temps by a couple of degrees throwing off required balances. Depending upon the pants worn the temps could cause unrepairable damage. A two degree celcius increase is all that is required.
We need to get back into the boys and mens skirts and dresses.
If for no other reason then for mens health.
I am a male that does wear lingerie, dresses, skirts ect… People all have hang ups. Most individuals, have something to hide in their lives, and therefore attack things, they do not understand. I am 100% hetrosexual.
I am a guy and I recently went into a ladies lingerie store and purchased a satin kimono wrap. The sales assistant did not think anything was untoward when she knew the garment was for myself to wear and even went onto say that there’s nothing wrong in treating yourself to a little bit of luxury. Both satin and silk has been utilised for many years by garment manufacturers for it’s luxorious qualities but why is it that society only deems it accaptable for women and not men to partake in this little bit of luxury? For many years women have been crying out for equal rights and yet go into any clothes store and just look at the differences between men’s and women’s clothes with their choice of fine materials, fine colours and fine designs. No my friend, it is my belief that it should be the men crying out for equal rights.
I am a man and I like wearing dress or skirt very mush.
But, unfortunately, the society does not permit.
I do admire girls.They have opportunities to wear skirts / dress.
I just love it. But, I am not a gay nor a cross-dresser. I just love skirts / dress.
this is all just so much rubbish i have advocated and will continue to do so that males boys shouls wear dreses skirts slips pantiesand anything else that they realy dp wish and want to be wearing it makes perfect sense for males do be doing ds o females have had this option for decades but males are still confined to pants jeans slacks yuck i want to crossdress and be so allowed to wear a what i really do want to and to be comfortable doing so. you give me the money and i will make female clothing for males to be seen in!
Well I am a man and love to wear skirts. I get no sexual pleasure from them. I just find them much more comfortable. I say the heck with what people say or think. There is no law against wearing a skirt or dress if you are a man, so if you want to go and do it.
I am a crossdresser and my wife accepts it, I see nothing wrong with wearing dresses and I sew my own creations square dance clothing and petticoats and I look dam giid in them.
Deuteronomy 22:5 states:
The women shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a women’s garment:
There is nothing here that states a women can not wear pants or a man can not wear a dress. It was stated this way because GOD new the clothing styles would change over the years. Other words if women were the one’s wearing the pants, then men would not be a loud to wear pants, why women are. Should it turn around and women wear the trousers then men would have to start wearing the dresses and skirts. See it’s really not that hard to understand.
Thanks for your comment Dennis, but I don’t entirely understand your point. Are you saying that your Biblical position is that now that women wear pants that men should wear dresses? How do you Biblically deal with many of the clothing items that now are worn by both men and women – especially in the workplace for example safety equipment.
This interpretation of this verse doesn’t work well for me because at some point, some woman supposedly had to make the decision to “sin” and break this Biblical command, followed by more women, so that eventually the style would change enough so as to not be considered a “sin” anymore. If we were to take this verse literally (even in the interpretation above) it seems to prescribe very clear delineation between “male” and “female” clothing – with no exception. Anyone that was a “trendsetter” would be a sinner.
Mattie, Women’s clothing is what the women are wearing at the time. History now or future, David cut the skirt of King Saul off the king while he was sleeping. Key word (skirt) “ She touch the hem of his garment” As the styles change, for women and men Deuteronomy 22: 5 will still be, true. Because it does not say men cannot wear dresses or skirts and it does not say women cannot wear pants. No matter how the clothing styles change for men and women Deuteronomy 22: 5 will still be true.
But wasn’t the first woman who decided to wear her husband’s pants breaking the “rule” in Deut 22:5? I do see that once a style is in place that Deut 22:5 can be true, but when styles are in transition and women are wearing “men’s clothing” they are in violation are they not? And what about a man who wears his wife’s dress, is he not in violation of Deut 22:5 – even as you describe? Are you saying that simply because there is at least one man who wears exclusively female clothing that it makes it okay for other men to do so?
Overall I have a hard time finding a logical argument using the Bible to either justify (or condemn) clothing choices. Since most of the prescriptive Biblical fashions come out of the old testament, and happen to appear next to rules that require women to leave the village each month during their period, or a glutton to be stoned to death (among many interesting and violent rules that even the uber conservatives ignore). Given the how easy it is for me to dismiss other prescriptive Biblical texts, I also personally no longer struggle with dismissing a command on male and female fashion as Deut 22:5 is doing.
I love to dress up fully as a woman , I shave my whole body ,then applly full make up, I wear suspenders, stockings, a bra ,with silicone boobs in, I have many pretty girlie dresses and high heel shoes, I have matching hand bags and loads of different jewellery, and I have different wigs, I find it great fun going out with my friend who does the same , we sometimes go out with a couple of lady friends and we always have a good laugh, i do go out dressed in the day time shopping , its great having lady friends as they help you with your make up and dress…..
I dont think I will ever stop dressing as i have dressed all my life and could quite easily live in this role
I suppose it all depends on where you are coming from. I’ve underdressed for years and only occasionally been “found out”. I keep my feelings to myself partly to avoid offending others – though they have no right to be offended – and partly because after 50 years of underdressing it still gives me a thrill to be wearing female underwear when no-one knows I am doing so.
It is quite a (mild) turn on to be in a board meeting or, as I was recently, talking with government ministers wearing lace panties, suspender belt and lace top stockings.
I enjoy wearing feminine undies but have no desire to try and pass as a woman. However I would like to have the freedom to wear a dress, or even a pin-striped suit consisting of jacket and skirt. Why should I not be free to do so? I actually much prefer wearing a skirt to wearing trousers and that isn’t just because I’m Scottish and often wear a kilt. Before anyone asks I don’t wear feminine undies beneath my kilt. I adhere to the tradition of wearing nothing under my kilt – which is also quite arousing.
So, I’d like the freedom for men to be able to dress in public in anything they like. If they want to wear trousers or a 3-piece suite fine. But if I want to wear a pink blouse, navy pinstripe jacket and skirt over a pair of black stockings held up by a frilly basque and suspender set with soft silky knickers why on earth should I not be able to do so.
Lets have some equality of attire please.
i’m a masculine guy and i think dresses and skirts are very comfortable. i like to crossdress but i am not transgender. i’m one of the few gay-ish men who love wearing traditionally women’s clothes. i’ve attempted to find lingerie for men but non of it appeals to me. i like the lacey, frilly pink stuff. i like how my g strings have little flowers on them. i like the patterns on my lace top thigh highs. i have yet to find lingerie designed for men that appeals to this side of me.
if i’m just hanging out i love the feel and comfort of silk boy shorts, knee high argyle socks and a thin summer dress but i also like a binding latex corset with tight latex thigh highs and garter with a very restricting latex pencil skirt. what i’m saying is, i don’t just like wearing girlie clothes for the comfort.
as a society we need to allow everyone to express themselves openly.
I cannot agree more with Mattie’s statements. Personally, I do wear “female” clothing as much as I possibly can. I wear “female” undies almost exlusively and there’s nothing better feeling on your legs than a pair of nylons! I guess in today’s societal norms, I am a “freak”. However, I don’t see myself as a freak. The freaks, to me, are the IDIOTS who make fun of us men who like to feel comfortable. Wearing a non-constrictive dress or skirt is such a break from wearing tight fitting slacks and jeans. If all men wear “female” clothing would one day decide that enough is enough and step out into the world wearing our favorite “female” attire, what would happen? Would the world seize to exist as we know it? I don’t think so. I believe that if we did, we would see a lot of men walk around with a smile on their face because they finally can express themselves without having to hide.
I say we “crossdressers”(I hate that word because we are not really crossdressing, just perceived as doing so) declare a day of freedom and all wear our favorite outfit into the world. What a glorious day that would be!
I have thought about this for awhile, and have come to this conclusion. It relates to homophobia. If men could dress as they like, some would scrub up quiet well and could be mistaken for a woman, hence the gender conundrum. Clothes are easy gender identifier. Some heterosexual men across a room could misidentify a persons gender and because homophobia still exists they would feel shame that they found a fellow man physically attractive. I am heterosexual, yet I am very in touch with my emotions. I don’t see why us men masquerade as being tough, both physically and mentally. Sure I’m physically stronger than most women, but I doubt I’m much stronger mentally than most women.
It’s OK for woman to dress like men so why isn’t it ok for men to dress like woman? I love the feel of nylons and were them almost every day. I look forward to going home and putting my dress and heels onand doing my house work. If I could were what ever I wanted and not worry about it I would were a dress to work or out shopping.
I am far from homosexual. I have been in panties 24/7 for years no. As I write this, I am completely dressed in female attire. Panties, pantyhose, pumps, bra, full nylon slip, sweater and skirt! I for one, hate mens clothing.
i like you have been bra and pantied for years and hate mens clothes my wardrobe consits mostly of feminine clothes ony have 5 pair of mens pants and few shirts but have a dozen or more skirts blouses sweaters and 10 dresses only 6 pair of heals hard to find in my size but wonder why mne dont wear dresses they are more comfortable then the mens clothes and have more variety
I wear skirts, and on occasion a dress. I have worn dresses since I was 11 years of age. My mother believed boys and girls could dress exactly the same, Boys could wear dresses just as girls could wear pants. That gender had no bearing as to clothing, just that it hid your nakedness or kept you warm on chilly days. I wear my skirts outside and I do not try to hide the fact that I am a male. Why put on a mask? Why cover up the fact your a male with false fronts? As far as acceptance, I go shopping in my skirts, to the department stores and even the auto parts places. I have never been denigrated for it. In some stores women and some guys have either complimented me for the styles I wear or have asked where I got my skirts from. So acceptance is not negative or positive, it is just acceptance. Of course it is the acceptance of yourself that is the prime thing.
Mattie,
I think your article is spot on. Our society must find equality in the sexes and respect for each others’ choices. Each of us must have the freedom to wear what we wish with out ridicule or stereotyping.
We are way to quick as a society to stereotype someone. These assumptions do make asses out of us as the saying goes. People say gay or homosexual way to much in what they see in someone. And yet I remember when gay meant happy and fun loving. So by that definition… even though I’m straight… I do love the word gay and what that means.
It’s been said… “You never know someone until you walk in their shoes.” I agree with that. I now know why women take longer to get dressed. There is time, creativity and much effort put into to wearing feminine clothing and looking good. It’s a skill all males should learn even with so called “male clothes.” And if you are brave enough to mix it up and challenge what is normal… power to you.
Life is too short to wait for skirts and dresses to be worn by everyone. Be yourself and wear what you wish because life is way to short. You don’t want to have any regrets.
No one is cross dressed in any manner at all unless the person is wearing a garment which by its configuration interfaces only with specific female or specific male anatomy. Only bras and athletic supporters can make anyone “cross-dressed.” Beyond that, very few nuances apply, such as differences in tailoring of underwear, obviously wider is male tailored. Neck ties are indeed a phallic symbol and less appropriate for women to wear. They aren’t right for men to wear because there’s coercion for many men to wear them, and coercion is morally wrong. We weren’t intended to be cookie cutter replicas of everyone else. Therefore, all things arbitrarily designated “female only,” such as pleats, ruffles, ribbons, bows, rick-rack, metallic fabric, floral prints, lace—are still not sex differences. Google images “neck ruff” to see what frilly styles men used to wear—as men WITH FACIAL HAIR, not passing as women.
I like this article, it details my opinion on skirts and dresses rather conclusively. I like to dress up when I’m at home, and I’ve been planning on wearing women’s underwear out for a while recently. It’s still quite a leap to actually do it, even if nobody sees them. I don’t want to wear a dress all the time, there are days when pants are preferable simply for the warmth. I’m never going to pass for a woman, I’m 6′ tall with broad shoulders, a beard and the hairiest legs I’ve ever seen. Even if I shave, my masculinity will refuse to be hidden. What I want is for there to be men’s skirts and men’s dresses, because they will undoubtedly fit a lot nicer than women’s clothing.
James,
There is movement to get men into skirts as well as dresses. It is fear that keeps most men from donning a skirt and going about their business. I overcame this fear years ago as a boy.
At 11 I played outside with the other kids and I wore those really comfortable summer dresses. For church I wore a more dressier dress. My friends accepted me without reservation as did their parents. Considering this was the early 1960s is amazing in itself.
Today I wear my skirts outside with my Polo shirts. I also exclusive wear panties by Hanes or Vanity Fair (nylon). I have gone shopping, to McDonalds and even the auto parts stores. I have never been denigrated for choices of skirts, they are all knee length. So quit hiding within your home.
If you want to join this movement for acceptance the only way is to be out in public. Skirts fit the male anatomy easily and even though you would buy them from the womens’ sections of the stores, there are quite a few in colors or prints that are indeed masculine.
Im a guy and i have been wearing dresses and stuff since i can rember, but i used to sneak around to wear my sisters cloths when i was really young. Now im completley grown up and 5 years ago i told my sister my Dark secret about stealing her cloths…bla bla bla anyhow she gave me like 5 huge bags of her cloths and to this day we always trade cloths and we have a perfectly normal brother and sister relationship. My sister is also married and when i first met her husband before they got married i think the first thing he saw i was wearing a mini skirt and some cute top , he doesnt care i was more self conscious because i didnt want to look ugly!
the article is wonderful and for the first time I wore a dress yesterday
For over 6,000 years men did not wear trousers, even Jesus nor Christopher Columbus wore trousers, they wore a dresslike garment. Men wore high heeled pumps and stalkings and velvets hundres of years ago. It is our current culture that demand mem to weasr trousers, it is pure socialisim. Socialism is the means of limiting people rights. Women could wear anything while men is condemed if he does. It is time to remove the socialistic views of culture and not limit, men to wear pants.
What Would Jesus Do, he did not wear trousers, I know this affends moder U.S. culture, yet truth hurts.
Terry,
While it is true that men wore skirts and tunics (dresses) during the Roman, Greek and other empires. Little is said about the fact that right here in the U.S. from about 1835 to 1939 a family could purchase a dress for their sons. These were offered via the major department stores in New York, Chicago and the like. For families in smaller cities and rural areas the dresses were available via mail order much as the internet in todays society. These forms of clothing are not even discussed in either the history classes or the Home Economic classes. To verify this just go to his.clo., or to bobmoores photos at picasweb.
Trousers or pants are a relatively late comer to womens fashions (WW2), they have been evolving for men from Pantaloons to modern jeans, however some skirts are still available for men and boys.
I am a man and I love to dress like a woman! When I was little, my mother and sister liked to dress me up like a girl. I did not like it back then. A little while later, my family broke up when I was still in diapers. My family was composed of just my Dad and I after that.
When I was around eleven, the silky feel and look of pantyhose enticed to desire to own a pair of pantyhose. It was three years later that I was able to get my very own pantyhose. I loved the sexy, taboo feeling that the pantyhose gave me. I wore them under my pants to school on days that I did not have gym. Next I acquired a bra and I loved that too. I dreamed of some day wearing a dress over my bra and pantyhose.
At first I thought I am just a horny guy and wanting lingerie was just substitute sex, I thought that the urges would go away after I was married. After I was married, guess what, I still wanted to wear the lingerie. So, I started buying bra, panty and garter belt sets with stockings because they were so sexy. I hid them from my wife and wore them whenever I could. I made the mistake of telling her about my secret passion. She did not allow me to wear women’s clothes, but I continued to wear them secretly. Then I started to buy high heels. I would purge several times, mostly when ever she caught me and forced me dump my treasures.
After I lost her, I slept in nighties every night and I wore panties every day 23/ 7.
Then I bought a skirt and tank top to wear over my stuffed bra, panty, garter belt, stockings and high heels. I started permanently removing the hair from my legs. Then I permanently removed the hair from my face. Why do we get up every day and shave when there is electrolysis?
I would only go out late at night when I was wearing my outfit and do things like drop off bills at the night drops or just drive around en femme. I started wearing leotards and tights to exercise in, at first at home and later when I went to the gym. Then I pierced my ears, started wearing nail polish 24/ 7 and started wearing women’s perfume.
I owned around 75 pairs of panties, 10 bras, stockings, a half a dozen high heels. When I applied for a Victoria’s secret credit card and then I started to buy everything; tops, dresses, corsets, skirts, bras, a jacket, sweater, purse and accessories. I spent a couple thousand dollars on women’s wear in one year.
So in December of 2010, I decided that since I have all of these women’s things, that I truly enjoy wearing, that I would start wearing them out during the day. I cannot describe how free it makes me feel, it is wonderful. It is as thrilling as going naked in public but it is not illegal. The world did not end as I used to fear. The people that know me did not bat an eye when I started wearing dresses everywhere. No one minds a bit and no one has said a bad thing. There be some that laugh a little, but I do not care.
I have started using the ladies’ restroom. That feels kind of strange, but it feels better than going to the men’s restroom in a dress and I do need a nice clean spot to put my purse when I am busy using the facilities. I really love carrying a purse, I can carry all kinds of things in there. I do not break my nails digging around in big pockets. I am far from pretty, but most people probably do not even notice that I am a man in women’s clothing. The ladies’ restrooms are much cleaner and more private.
I am using the Brava breast enhancement system to enlarge my breasts. It is working very slowly and I am considering getting breast implants to get hem bigger faster and to give me the credence that I belong there when I am using the ladies’ restroom and also the women’s clothing will fit much better. I have always wanted to have a woman’s body and I will enjoy playing with my new breasts.
I am proud to wear a bra and panties and I do not care who knows it and I dress as a woman when ever I want to, which is most of the time. Remember this is the land of the free and the home of the brave. And takes balls to wear panties when most people are deathly afraid of not being considered as “normal” and being ostracized because of it. Hopefully, some day, I will find a woman that will accept me as I am and we will be happy together. But where to look for a woman that wants to love a man who dresses head to toe as a woman?
If you wish you can join Experience Project . com. There are women and men there who do enjoy guys wearing dresses and things. It is not a porno site, just a place you can openly discuss the need to dress with othersd of the same ilk. I am a member there and have met lots of new friends.
I don’t see hardley any posts by wives or girlfriends. My husband and I used to belong to and were very active in Tri-Ess. He “came out of the closet” at about age 50. A huge shock. Hard to believe that my husband even thought about wearing women’s clothing.
We joined Tri-Ess (Society for the Second Self) and the local chapter. We went on S.P.I.C.E. ocean cruise and attended S.P.I.C.E. conferences and outings. We also went on several “Dignity Cruises” and Tri-Ess parites and outings where the husbands all crossdressed. Seeing my husband “enfemme” was just too difficult, so I put so much pressure on him that his feminine side is deeply back in the closet.
I did notice, and I notice now, that when he crossdressed, and during the 5- years or so during which I tried to be supportive, his personality became quite different. He became a much, much nicer person. He became more interested in talking with me at night rather than watching TV or sleeping on the sofa. His “feminine” personality began to show, and I really like that. Too bad it took a dress to bring out that side of him. Now that his feminine side is dead (and its really dead) his personality has reverted to its old “maleness”. But I can not stand, even occasionally, seeing him as a woman.
Tri-Ess and SPICE were very good. Chance to meet with hundreds of other wives of crossdressers. Many, maybe most, were suppportive; however, many were 100% opposed. Many seek divorce at that idea that their man has a “second-self” or would want to occasionally emulate a woman, or god-forbid, might have a “feminine side”.
If I could pick and choose, I’d like him to some how retain certain of the personality traits that came out during his open crossdressing period. That part was really great. He was so very caring. So concerned and considerate. But, I simply can’t stand to see him interested in women’s clothing or getting dressed up once in a while.
I’d like to hear from the wives.
Diane
Diane,
I am a member of ExperienceProject.com. There are women and men there who openly discuss men wearing dresses and skirts. There is also mothers and their sons chatting about it. It is a free site. I have met several new friends there, young and old. I have worn dresses since I was 11. My mom believed that boys and girls could and should dress the same as clothing doesn’t determine the person you are, nor do they affect your sexual orientation (gay/straight).
I wear long shirts to make it feel like a dress, I don’t wear anything else underneath. The shirt acts like a miniskirt. But my wife gets mad went I go outside even though its just out on the back patio.