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Size Matters

Well not THAT. Well, yeah, that too in the proper context I guess but that’s not what I’m writing about!

Some of you gals won’t get this at all. Some are blessed to slide right into a size 6 or 8 with no problem, can pick out a lovely pair of size 7 heels and go on your way – but many of us are not so blessed. The size that is so often considered a bonus to a male is a curse to the transsexual or CD who is looking to fill out her wardrobe with flattering outfits. How frustrating it can be, particularly if you are forced to make your purchases at thrift shops were size selection is already spotty, to find the adorable skirt in a size 12 when you require a 16, or the very pair of sandals you need – only they are eights when you need eleven wide.

It’s at times like this I find it difficult to be happy for my sisters who are built for the typically available sizes because I’m too busy being insanely jealous! What makes it worse is that I have a long standing self image of who my female self is and what she looks like, and I always saw that girl as being petite, short and relatively slender (though with enough padding to make nice curves) and in that sense even fitting into a 12, or a size nine shoe, while it would give me WAY more options, doesn’t really often live up to the vision I’d LIKE to see in the mirror. But then, that’s just the sort of self criticism all women are prone to. It’s not original or unusual, but it does serve to magnify my frustration with being too big for anything cute.

(Continued below...)

I’ve heard other girls say that the revel in being the tallest girl in the room. I’m happy for them but that’s sure not how I feel. Particularly when it’s not just height but width that’s an issue. Consider the cut of the typical blouse. It’s designed for a narrower chest, albeit with the presence of some breast, narrower shoulders, and a shorter overall torso. So in order to have a really flattering blouse if you are a genetic male who’s approaching six feet and 200 pounds (or more) you have to deal with finding something big enough to be flattering across the shoulders and chest to start with, then nine times out of ten it’s STILL going to be too short! Maddening!

Yes, in the days of the internet there are specialty sites online which deal in women’s clothing cut especially for the male-bodied customer, but if you have a thrift store budget you can forget browsing those, unless you feel the need for a nice bout of depression! Does this sound like a rant? ‘Cause I kind feel like all I can do on this subject is rant. Want to rant with me?

Photo by nycbone

Posted on September 21, 2012 by Tammy Beth. This entry was posted in Clothing, Life in Transgender. Bookmark the permalink.
Men in Tights (and skirts, and scarves, and stuff) revisited.
Mixed Messages

6 thoughts on “Size Matters”

  1. Stace says:
    September 21, 2012 at 2:57 pm

    OK, first off – I’m sorry I am one of the lucky ones you refer to though my Mum hates it when she uses that phrase.

    Not that it helps your situation, but you struggle to be happy for people like me. I struggle to accept the luck I have there as I spend my time feeling insanely guilty about it. Not that I have a perfect figure – far from it; but I do understand that the issues I have are far removed from struggling to find something in normal shops.

    You’re reference to tall though… OK I moved from the UK to Holland where I am average height. But even in the UK I’ve learned not to worry about the height too much 6″2′ in my highest heels and when I went to Scotland I towered above my mum and most of the other women. Yes I felt it, but then my wife was with me and she is slightly taller than I am (when neither of us are in our heels). And we have a friend who is 6″4′ (at least!) without any shoes. You don’t have to love your height, just don’t fear it.

    Stace

    Reply
  2. Briana says:
    September 22, 2012 at 12:04 pm

    Hi,
    I started my journey about 2 yrs ago and have been educating myself on sizes and I to have this frustration! I actualy can fit cloth”s and shoes that are not toooo out of the norm, I guess the biggest beef I have is a size 10 on one brand will be different from a 10 in another. I end up trying on cloth’s a lot because of this

    Briana

    Reply
  3. Leah Lenoire says:
    September 23, 2012 at 1:43 am

    Beth, I know how you feel. I wear a size 12 shoe if I’m lucky. Size can be a real bitch but I think it’s important to keep perspective on what’s important. The most important thing is to feel beautiful. I know we might not all fit in to the latest hot finds at the mall but if you’re not a seventeen year old girl you’re just not. It’s ok, accept it. Get the things that make you look and feel pretty. They are out there, you might have to look a little harder and think a little more carefully about what makes you look hot but believe me you can find it. It’s best if you can get a second opinion from someone you trust and go from there. But Remember the most important thing is that you feel beautiful. If you feel beautiful then the confidence will come naturally and increase that beauty. Thanks for listening.

    Leah

    Reply
  4. Marlane says:
    June 20, 2013 at 5:52 pm

    I don’t know where to start. First of all SIZING does matter is every aspect of crossdressing. Womens clothes sizing is all over the map. I can’t figure out if there is a conscious effort to deliberately keep
    sizing on a need too know basis, or is it a way to make us feel better if a size Large fits instead of an XL. Oh Girl….I’m Normal!!!!
    I am in my early 60’s and am most comfortable wearing clothes that make me feel self confident. I can fantasize with the best of em when passing a Forever 21 store but I am knocked back into reality when I see what passes for fashion today. I am on a constant search for a place that sells womens plus size clothes in natural fabrics. It seem once you go to 1x you have to be prepared for some of the most God awful fabrics the third world has ever made. Not to mention the unusual amount of animal or loud prints on display in most “Womens” depts.. If anyone out there knows of a store that sells plus sized clothes in tasteful comfortable, cotton fabrics, please let me know. I am not opposed to relocating at this point.
    As far as stature, I am 5′ 9″ and could use to shed some pounds, but my arch nemesis is my upper body. That, I feel is my dead give away.
    Thanks for letting me get this off my ……

    Marlane

    Reply
  5. Staci says:
    July 20, 2013 at 11:27 pm

    I feel for you girlfriend! I’m kind of an in between. I am 5’9″ and 145# with a 29″ waist so in some clothes, I can wear a size 7 or even sometimes a size 6. But I have my biggest problem with buying that cute dress or skirt and of course pumps or sandals (which I wear an 11-12). All I can do is continue working on my waist line3 and hips (I have a 34 bust (B)). Good luck hon!

    Reply
  6. urmila says:
    December 12, 2013 at 8:41 am

    I am lucky in that accept. I am only 5’4″ which is little above the average jeight of Indian female(5’2″). But now the average ht is increasing and quite a few young Indian girls are much taller than me and dresses are available and my foot wear size is 6 and it is not a problem at all for me to get footware. I wear padded bras and the only problem was my narrow hip and have to do some alteration on the standard dresses.Hence i wear mostly sarees, or salwar suits.

    Reply

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